Months One and Two

So, now that you know our big news, I have the freedom to vent about my pregnancy experience so far...

Month 1:
Consolations: We found out we were pregnant (very early, I might add) and felt much joy and excitement. I was blessed with the ability to continue running and enjoyed weeks full of mileage. I was surprised to find out how much better I felt after a nice long hour of running, and how much better my appetite was.

Desolations: We found out we were pregnant so early because I was nauseous and a complete insomniac. Now, I'm a girl who LOVES her sleep, so messing with that has desperate consequences. I was cranky, angry and tired. I had huge circles under my eyes and pretty much didn't enjoy anything except my running escapes. I started having trouble making our weekly menu plans and had about 5 days where I just flat out couldn't make dinner for Seth and Ella. That of course made me frustrated and feel like I wasn't caring for my family appropriately.


Month 2:
Consolations: A couple more weeks of running. I continued training for a half marathon and was running strong through 8 mile long runs. It was such a relief to keep running, and again, it really helped keep my appetite up in a healthy way. Seth has been an amazing support and took the reigns in the kitchen for a while. Most importantly, he's picked up some slack I'm leaving in the domestic chores area. He's also really helped me work with my insomnia problem. Also, I didn't feel the same ridiculous fatigue I had with Eleanor - where I had to go to bed at 6:30 in the evening. It was a blessing to make it to her bed time and beyond without any real problems.

Desolations: Sickness, sickness, sickness. Right around the 4 1/2 week mark I got really nauseous. Now, I was sick with Eleanor, but only for a few hours a day and I think it only ranged from around week 6 or 7 to week 10 or 11. This time, I feel nauseous 18 to 20 hours a day, have trouble falling asleep because I feel so horrible, think of food obsessively because I want to eat so badly, but everything sounds terrible. I also vomit a lot. A lot. Luckily, I feel like I'm able to keep enough nourishment down that I'm not worried about getting dehydrated. Also, around week 7 I lost my ability to run. Huge bummer! This happened in my first pregnancy, too, and actually started earlier that time, so I'm not totally surprised, but I was really hoping to avoid it this time around. I still haven't found an alternative, so now I'm not exercising - which makes me feel even more sloth-like and bummed - but hopefully I'll get this worked out soon. With Ella, I swam everyday... but right now we don't have a gym membership, so that's not an option. I'm still having trouble with dinners - can't plan them, can't cook them and often can't eat them. And, I've totally gone against my gluten free, dairy free, yeast free, sugar free diet. I just reach for whatever sounds the least offensive at any given moment. Unfortunately, I'm feeling consequences there, too, but in the moment those foods bring comfort and nourishment and a way to get through feeling so bad. I am desperately praying for a lifting of this "morning sickness" in the next couple of weeks and a return of my old eating habits, likes, dislikes and abilities. It is frustrating to just totally not feel like yourself!

At the end of each day, however, no matter how horrible I feel or have felt, I'm thankful for this new little life. We are looking forward to meeting you, Baby, grow strong and healthy!